16 Weeks

Hi Friends!

I know it’s been a while. As great of an idea as it is to bring my laptop to work and blog during lunch it only works when I actually get to take my lunch break, which hasn’t been often, recently. 😦

Our computer network has been down for about an hour so I figured it was as good of a time as any to actually take my break today. Want to know what’s even better? The weather is GORGEOUS today! GORGEOUS!!

Today has been pretty positive, aside from the muttering at my desk.  You see, with the system being down, I’m unable to finish a ton of reports that need to be sent out. It’s annoying enough that the system is down, but to top it off I’ve already done these reports once before and our system didn’t have the most up to date information downloaded. I’m not talking about 1 or 2 reports. I’m talking more than 50. Sigh….

Ok, back to the positive. My day began with an awesome sweat session at the gym. I knocked out some cardio and then rocked a weight workout. My face was glistening by the time it was over and done with. Just how I like it!

Over the past week I’ve been rethinking my goals. A few months ago I mentioned wanting to step on stage for a fitness competition and after a bad experience with a trainer I decided to put the goal on the backburner. I took some time to be more balanced and focus on health, opposed to achieving a certain weight/fitness goal.

Well, the itch to achieve that forever dream of mine has been hitting me pretty strong recently. Over the weekend I tweeted to find out how to get connected with a trainer who has competition experience. Through another fitness competitor I found my answer.

I reached out to her recommended trainer last night and received not only quick feedback, but detailed. I’m not sure if I mentioned it, but I continued to get candy coated answers with the last trainer I was using and I was becoming extremely frustrated. I loved that the trainer who responded to me gave feedback, point-by-point, in response to the questions I asked of her. She won major points in my eyes just from one e-mail. She also showed concern as far as what was best for me (Ex: what worked out financially). She would help me make it work depending on what I had to work with. Bonus points for her!

I spoke to Rob about it last night. I believe I began the conversation with “Do you think you’ll kill me if I decided I want to compete again?” LOL. There might have been some eye rolling and the mention that maybe I should just get a dog, but in the end he supports me know matter what I decide to do. He just wants me to be healthy and happy. I might have mentioned to him that they have a couples program, but he exclaimed that after seeing how I workout he wants nothing to do with it. Ha-ha. Hey, go hard or go home, right? 😉

So, after Rob went to bed, I was up until the wee hours of the morning looking over the trainer’s website and the transformation stories there. Before my head hit the pillow I knew what I was going to do. I just had to see what the trainer suggested as to how many weeks it would take me to make the transformation I am looking for.

16 Weeks…

Are you ready to take the ride with me?  I’m so looking forward to seeing the end result!

Hope your first month in the new year got off to a great start for you.  Let’s make the 2nd month even better!! Have any of your goals/resolutions changed now that we’re a month into 2012?  Tell me.  I want to know. 🙂

Kim

Eerie Office Quietness

Hello My Friends,

Is it as gray and chilly by you as it is me?  My entire commute to work was a horror show, due to the extreme downpour that ensued as soon as I pulled out of my driveway.  Sad smile  At one point I thought that I was going to have to pull over and wait it out.  Fortunately, just when I was making my decision the rain began to slow down and I managed to drive all the way through.

It seemed that there were a number of commuters who most definitely should have pulled over during their ride.  There were quite a few accidents along my route, including a 4 car accident that held me up for a while.  You know how much I hate traffic, right?  Errr….  No matter how annoyed I am with traffic, whenever I see an accident the only thing I think about are wishes that everyone involved is ok.  After the two accidents I had last year, within a month of each other to boot, I know how scary, frustrating and upsetting it can be.

I took my time, enjoying my freshly brewed coffee and listening to my favorite morning show.  Other than the traffic (and the fact that I was driving to work and not someplace more fun) I was in a pretty pleasant mood.  I had even allowed myself to sleep in this morning and skip the gym, because I’ve been SO tired lately and my body needed a rest.  With ample sleep and a belly full of coffee I eventually made it to the office, safe and sound. Smile

The office became unusually quiet by the end of the day yesterday.  If you only knew how crazy it usually is in that place you’d know the quiet can be quite eerie.  That same quietness seems to have trickled into today.  Others have actually come to my desk to comment on it.  It’s really quite strange, but I’m not going to complain knowing that next week is going to be absolutely nuts with meetings and travel planning.  I’ll take advantage while I can!

I’ve been thinking of some things that I’d like to share with you.  Hopefully, I’ll have some time this weekend to write them out the way that I’d like.  I feel like I’m always rushing to post and don’t get as much time as I’d like to look things over and add well-rounded content.

Currently there’s no internet access available where I’m blogging from, so I’m unable to reply to some comments that I saw yesterday. I promise to get back to you ASAP and think there might even be a post stemming off of one of the questions I received. Smile

I was also looking forward to reading some of my favorite blogs, but that obviously isn’t an option either.  Boo!  The good news is I remembered to bring my kindle with me and I’m going to spend the remainder of my break immersing myself in another world.  Have I ever mentioned how much I love to read?  It’s always been one of my favorite things to do.  Unfortunately, as I’ve gotten older I’ve had less time for it.  I’m working on that though.  It’s one of my goals this year, remember?

Other than that, not too much else to report.  I’m not sure when the internet will be back up so I can actually post this, but I wanted to be sure to stop in and say hello before the day got away from me.  I hope this finds you well and that this week ends on a high point for you.  I’m getting ready to do my Friday Morning Happy Dance…..only about 16 more hours to go. Winking smile

Anything unusual happening at your office today?

Kim

When “No” Becomes “Yes”

Hi Guys!

Middle of the week….I am starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  Even better?  I was asked yesterday to attend an advanced PowerPoint class on behalf of my company, so I’ll be out of the office on Monday for training.  It’s always nice to get out of the office to switch things up a bit.  Doing new things is also good for someone like me who tends to stick to what they know and never venture out of the norm.  There’s no turning back now.  I’m excited for something new and also to add more to my skill base.  It never hurts, that’s for sure.

This morning started off with an early gym session to pump out a functional workout.  My core and shoulders will be loving and hating me at about the same time.  I can’t begin to tell you the changes I’ve seen in my core since adding functional workouts to my routine.  This is the first time EVER that I’ve actually seen things changing for the positive with my own two eyes and also realize that what I’m looking to achieve is within my reach.

I have to tell you that besides the stress I’ve been going through recently, I’m in a happy mood today.  My stressors are things that can be fixed.  Now might not be the time to fix them, but at least I can try to stay positive knowing that I’m not stuck forever.  Instead, I’m trying to focus on all of the good in my life.  Sometimes, in the moment, you forget what’s really important in life, like your health, the people you love and all of the struggles you’ve encountered on your journey that you actually tackled.

Within the past year I’d say that I’ve come a long way.  My disordered eating patterns have changed drastically for the better (not perfect yet, but much, MUCH better than they had been) and I’ve definitely grown as a person.  I’m still shy compared to most others, but I’m breaking certain barriers that I once had.

At one time, if a person told me “No” I would take it at face value.  Now, I’ve learned to push the envelope a bit and question “Why?”  I’ve learned that communication is key and sometimes you have to explain yourself in order to turn that “no” into a “yes”.

If you remember, about a month ago, I mentioned that I tried an online training program, but it seemed to be “One Size Fits All“.  They didn’t seem to want to budge with the program they were giving others, which upset me because we are all unique and need different things for success, just like each child learns a different way in school.  The teacher wouldn’t ask the student to adapt to a style that doesn’t work for them.  Instead, the teacher would try to incorporate different methods of teaching so that each individual child could learn the same concept in their own way (at least, that’s what a good teacher would do).

I was honestly bummed because I’ve seen others who have had so much success with the program and I was really hard on myself for not being able to be one of those successes.  I knew the method wasn’t healthy for me though, so I told the company that I was going to have to stop. 

The trainer reached out to me and tried to explain her reasoning for doing things their way.  In turn, I responded with what this crazy mind of mine does why I needed things a different way.  Do you know what happened?  The trainer came back to me letting me know that they would work with my needs.  YAY!  🙂

It turns out that they thought I would have problems, knowing my eating disorder history, with the program I was asking for.  My reasoning helped them to see that the method I was asking for would actually help me.  They told me to always be honest with them and let them know if I’m having any eating issues.  They want me to achieve my fitness goals in the healthiest way possible.

Sometimes, you have to push in order to receive.  I think good ol’ Rob has rubbed off on me a bit.  😉  He pushes for what he wants in life and most times he gets what he wants.  If you don’t ask you’ll never know what might be possible.

Ok, back to work I go.  I hope this Wednesday is treating you well.  Only a few more days until the weekend!

Kim

My Security Blankets

Hi Friends!

How’s your week going so far?  It’s only Tuesday, but I’m already exhausted.  My boss leaves for Italy today and was in an all day (literally 9-5) meeting yesterday.  I had to come in early to insure that I would actually get some time with him. Then, I had to stay almost 2 hours late in order to go over everything he wanted me to work on while he’s away.

My body can’t keep up with the stress and hours here.  On top of it all, I’m definitely not paid enough to do what I do and work the number of hours that I work.  I love the majority of the people who I work with, but other than that this isn’t really worth it.  Rob has commented a number of times that he hates my job.  It isn’t even my having to work late as much as his having to deal with my being so stressed out when I get home.

Confession #1: I used to have a security blanket growing up.

When I was a baby, my Dad tried to soothe me to sleep one night. He put a blanket over his shoulder, laid me over it and rubbed my back while saying “Do naw-nees Kimmy.”  I doubt that naw-nees is a real word or if that’s how you would spell it if it were. What I do know is that naw-nees meant to go to sleep.  What my dad never would have guessed is that I would relate naw-nees to the blanket and that from then on my security blanket would be called “Naw-Nees”.

Confession #2: “Used to” is a thing of the past, in the confession above.

Let it be known that the blanket (aka Naw-Nees) has come out from hiding for the past month or so.,,,,just about the time I started to have eyelid twitches.  Rob cringes when he sees me with it because he knows why I have it.  I keep half of it at the house and the other half in the car.  I’m 32!  What’s wrong with this picture? If I ever confess to sucking on a pacifier let me know that I’m being ridiculous, ok?  😉

This weekend, I spent time with the mother of all security blankets.  I call her Mom.  I’ll tell ya, there’s nothing like being with my mom.  We get along so well and enjoy each other’s company immensely.  For me, my mom has always brought a sense of security.  No matter what age I’ve been, I could always call my mom and know that my problem would either be solved or that she would just be able to put my mind at ease until the problem was resolved.  She’s just good like that. 🙂

We made a stop at some of our favorite places while I was there, but didn’t get to hit everything that we had planned on. I then cried almost the entire way home to NY. I miss her so much and I miss CT too.  😦

Of course, I had my Rob waiting for me back at the house.  He’s another wonderful security blanket in my life.  He knew something was wrong when he saw me and when he questioned if I was ok the floodgates reopened.  The poor guy was wearing a white shirt which I quickly messed with my tears and smeared makeup. Eventually, after a bunch of hugs, he had me laughing and being silly again, in our usually Rob-Kim fashion.

I’m looking forward to more feelings of security when we visit CT this weekend for my sister’s engagement party.  Once there, I’ll be surrounded by everyone that I care about, all in one place.  Rob & my blanket will just have to do until then.  😉

Hope you’re having a great day!

Kim

Trampled Towel Palace

Happy Friday, Friends!

Seeing as I started the week off thinking that it was Tuesday, rather than Monday, it seemed like Friday was taking forever to get here.  Now that it has, I’m excited to get my weekend started.

Rob drove me into work today, because he picked me up last night on our way to the concert (more on that in a bit) and I left it overnight in the work parking lot.  It was nice having that extra little bit of down time with him in the morning.  We left a little early, made a quick stop at Starbucks (Venti Bold & a wrap for him and a Venti Awake Tea for me), and chatted the entire way to my building.  He dropped me off at the front door about 15 minutes early and I got started with the work day. 

Those 15 minutes have made my morning feel extra long, for some reason.  It never helps when your e-mail is down for the millionth time again and you have to wait for IT to come get things going.  IT performed an downgrade “upgrade” on our computer systems last week and things have been a nightmare ever since.  I share a calendar and e-mail inbox with my boss and all of the permissions have been messed up.  I can’t do anything on his behalf, which is frustrating for both of us.  The system has also been deleting e-mails on its own and blocking e-mails from coming through.  When I arrived this morning my inbox was showing as me not receiving any e-mails since 3:35 yesterday afternoon, which if you knew the amount of e-mailing I do you’d know that would be impossible. Errrr…..

Oh well, let’s look at the positive.  It’s Friday, it’s beautiful out AND I get to see my mom this weekend!  Rob is heading down to a cigar festival and then Atlantic City with a friend of his and I’m spending some much-needed girl time with my mom.  Our list of plans keeps growing…

  • The Christmas Tree Shoppe
  • Yankee Candle Store
  • Walk around the pond at our favorite park.
  • Grab some Skim Mistos at Starbucks together
  • Possibly get our nails done
  • Finish the engagement party “to-dos” off our “to-do” list
  • Get my hair done
  • Random Errands
  • Trip to: Kohl’s, Bed Bath & Beyond, the mall, etc
  • A night of Lifetime movies, since I’ll be sleeping over

I’m excited!  There’s nothing like time with my mom!

As for the concert last night, it was a bit of a disappointment. 😦  Rob and I made it to the city after almost 2 hours of driving, due to the rain, some crazy drivers and finding no place to park.  We had tickets, but the line to get in was ridiculous. 

A large group of us made our way through Central Park and finally found our way to the Great Lawn. It could have been perfect had the weather held up, but the rain wouldn’t hold off.  Rob was smart, bringing garbage bags to cover the grass with and then towels for us to sit on.  We cuddled together, holding an umbrella over our heads, and closed our eyes to enjoy the music.  It was actually very romantic, in spite of the rain.  We made it through one piece of the Philharmonic playing and then two additional songs by Andrea and then we were trampled on. 

At that point, it was completely uncomfortable.  People didn’t care if they were walking over you and they continued to talk as the concert went on.  Rob quickly got me up off of our towel palace and pulled me through the craziness. 

If you remember, we were supposed to go to the concert with friends, but everyone backed out.  As we walked through Central Park, making our way back to the car, Rob said I’m the only one that never lets him down and that he loves our adventures together.  My heart soared.  Each of us looked so silly, wearing garbage bags and towels wrapped around our shoulders, but I was happy as a clam. 🙂

Even though we didn’t get the full experience we were hoping for, I’m glad that we went.  Any time I have with Rob is treasured and I love exploring and doing new things with him.

Now, my friends, it’s time to get back into work mode.  I’m so not in work mode today.  I want to get out and enjoy this beautiful weather!

Wishing you a Wonderful Weekend!

Kim

Workout Switch Up

Hi Friends,

Man, it feels like forever since I’ve been able to pop in. Things here have been more than a little crazy lately and I’m feeling a bit zombie-like. My coworker is finally back, so some of the stress has lifted off of my shoulders; however, we are now entering our busy season which means more work (and craziness) in general.

What I would give to be outside right now. I’m staring out the large window in our reception area watching the trees in all of their beautiful, green glory swaying in the breeze. The sun is shining and I’m sure there are birds chirping somewhere nearby, as well. 😉 Instead, I’m cooped up inside and probably won’t feel any fresh air until I leave for the day….at whatever time that might be tonight.

On a positive note, today was the first day of my beginner’s running program and I rocked it! I thought for sure that I would have a problem waking up early this morning, to hit the gym before work, since I barely got any sleep last night. It actually didn’t faze me at all. I stayed in bed an extra 10 minutes, since I had already allotted it into the time I set my alarm for. Then, I popped up and got moving.

The parking lot at the gym tricked me into believing that there were more people there than there actually were. I was happily surprised when I walked in to find my fair share of treadmills for the picking. It turned out that most people there came to take an aerobic class. Lucky me! I chose my treadmill and quickly got into a rhythm and focused on my breathing. Eventually, I completely zoned out and the run was over before I knew it.

Then, it was time to hit the weights. I found an old routine in my gym bag which I decided to start up again today. It didn’t disappoint and I felt very accomplished by the time I stepped out of the gym at 7AM. I was sweaty, my muscles were pumping and I was full of energy. It was the perfect way to get this Tuesday started.

I’m thinking of switching up my workout times a bit or I might break my routine into two different parts. Breaking it up wouldn’t be to get more exercise in during the day; rather, it would be to let out some energy built up from stress. I always feel better after working out and I like having some sort of a routine. Lately, it’s been a great way to get me going in the morning and I notice when I go after work that I feel much better than when I walked in the doors. Granted, I have limited time in my schedule, so this might not work everyday for me, but maybe I’ll switch it up a couple of times a week to see what brings about the most positive change in my mood. More importantly is getting to the gym, no matter what time of day it ends up being.

I’m sorry if I sound a bit down. There’s a lot weighing on my mind lately and I’m feeling a little lost and trapped. I know what I want to do. I just don’t have the means to make it happen right now. I have some more investigating to do and hopefully I’ll be able to make some positive changes in the near future. I have a ton of support between my family and Rob. The timing is just off right now and of course finances always have to be worked out. I know I’m being vague, but some of you might know what I’m referring to.

Hope you have a wonderful day! 🙂

Kim

Felt Like a School Day

Hi Friends!

After being treated to a week of beautiful weather, NY has now been experiencing days of rain. 😦 

Rain rain go away!  That’s what I say. 😉  Despite the flood like situation in the parking lot at the office, I’ve been putting fires out left and right today.  We’ve been experiencing computer issues due to an upgrade, ironically.  There have also been other mishaps throwing curveballs throughout the day.  Ah, well, it’s 12:45.  How much more could happen before closing?  Wait, don’t answer that. 😉  I’m trying to stay positive.

Monday night I tried to go to bed early, in anticipation of going back to work.  I felt like it was the night before my first day of school after summer break.  I twisted and turned in bed, eventually making my way to the couch so that I wouldn’t disturb Rob.  I must have drifted off to sleep at some point because the next thing I knew it sounded like there was a downpour right in the house and I jumped up to see what was going on.

The sudden downpour must have woken Rob up at the same time, because he came out of the bedroom to look for me and then we both walked down the hall back to bed.  Before I knew it, my alarm was buzzing me awake to start the day.  Morning seemed to arrive far too quickly, but I guess that’s what happens when you spend more hours awake than actually sleeping.

Have you noticed that it’s darker out in the mornings now?  That snuck up on me for some reason.  The darker morning helped in making it truly feet like a school day.  I pushed myself out of bed to shower, dress and prep my meals.  Afterwards, I reluctantly stepped outside with my protein shake in hand to make my way to the car.  While driving I noticed that the roads were more crowded, police were directing traffic outside of the schools and leaves were beginning to make their journey to the ground.  Fall is definitely in the air, friends.

I’m hanging on to any last bits of summer that there might be, but I’m also looking forward to experiencing fall in all of its glory.  Fall brings a sense of comfort to me.  It must be the memories of back to school shopping with my mom, raking up leaves only to jump in the pile and make a mess again, picking apples, morning hikes while breathing in fresh, crisp air, comfy sweaters, searching for the perfect pumpkin with my family and eventually Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday).  I love it all!

It’s just about time for me to go back to extinguishing fires here, but I promise to be back tonight (or at the latest tomorrow), because I have so much to catch you up on.  Like, whatever happened with my August goals?  Do I have new goals for September?  Plus, there’s some fun stuff going on in the very near future. 🙂

Wishing you a Wonderful Wednesday!

Kim