Lost

Hey Guys!

I’ve been a bad blogger lately, huh?  Oh, don’t sugar coat it.  I know I have been.  It’s been on my mind.  Really, it has, but somewhere along the way I lost my mojo and feel kind of…lost.  I sit in front of my laptop and nothing comes to mind that I think anyone would be interested in.  Kind of strange seeing as I just got back from all the HLS excitement and a wonderful weekend with my sister in Chicago.  I have a ton of pictures to show you and I roam around in this “blah” mood.  So, as I was cleaning my bathroom (such an exciting life I lead), the word “lost”  kept coming to mind. 

Where is the girl who was so excited to start her nutrition program?  The one that was geared up to get into the best shape of her life (in a balanced way)?  The girl who wants to try new things and knock anything down that gets in her path?  If any of you know where I can find her I’ll reward you greatly, because it sure as heck beats me.

What I do know is that I’m the person in control of my life.  Tonight, before that whole bathroom scrub session, I decided that I needed to get down to basics.  It’s been a while since I’ve done things around here that I’ve really enjoyed.  My fridge is still pretty bare, but I was able to scrounge up some random ingredients to whip up dinner.  I then set it out on those new plates I bought a few months ago.  A tinge of happiness started to run through my veins.  I’m such a simple gal, I tell ya. 😉  It’s the little things in life that make me happy.  Before heading to the bathroom to clean I got my favorite flavored coffee brewing.  Now, I’m sitting here sipping it from one of my new mugs and a totally content feeling has enveloped me.  I realize that I’ve let some things get in the way of my happiness and that I just have to get back on track. 

For one, this girl needs to get to bed earlier than 1 AM.  My mind always seems to be racing and to top it off I’m naturally a night owl.  I must make a concerted effort to get to bed earlier because with the late nights I never want to wake up for my planned morning workout.  Missing my workout then starts my day with me being mad at myself.  Not only do I sleep past my workout time, I sleep past the time I should be getting up just to get to work.  Rushing around like a mad woman soon ensues my rolling off the couch. Yes, the couch.  Why the couch you ask?  I try to make myself tired by watching tv and eventually it works, but I end up sleeping on the couch when I have a perfectly comfortable, big, cloud-like bed I could be sleeping on.  So, I stumble off the couch in a tired stupor, rush, rush, rush around (because I hate to be late), don’t necessarily have the most filling meals with me (I grab RTD shakes and yogurt because they’re quick, healthy and easy) and the rest of my day is a blur.  I get home tired and annoyed with myself.  Honestly, it’s most likely I haven’t blogged because of my being so frustrated with myself.   Whole new ballgame now!

Somehow, this turned into a much longer post than I thought it would be.  I mean, who would think that it all started with the word “lost” bouncing around in my mind?  This weekend I’m going to write out some goals for myself that I’ll post here on Monday.  I need to create a schedule for myself that will keep me on task for all of the things I’d like to accomplish.   

My travel last weekend and being away most weekends recently has thrown me off because normally I don’t have much going on and am used to the little routine I had set up for myself.  Now, I need to head to my disaster of a bedroom and get started on organizing it a bit.  I find that having my apartment organized leads to my life being more organized and on track. 

Do you find that your home’s appearance is like an outsider’s view of what may be going on inside of you?  I know that mine definitely does.  When I’m depressed, my apartment tends to be messy and unorganized.  I don’t care about it and don’t seem to really care about myself in those times.  When I’m on track my apartment tends to be neat and welcoming.  Just something I’ve noticed over the years….

Ok, I’ve procrastinated long enough.  Off to the bedroom I go!  Have a great night!! 🙂

Kim

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